Friday, January 04, 2008

Posts are coming like rain today....

I talked to SC today. His situation has gone from weird to weirder lately.

He started out explaining that he likes to make "country fried steak" with the venison he got from hunting. He said, "It's a Southern thing." I reminded him that I'm a Texas girl, and need no explanation of country fried anything. He also asked about my trip home from Texas, adding, "Did you get BF snapped into shape?"

He's referring to Fella.

I said, "BF? No. I don't know if I can count him as a BF if he's saying it's okay for me to go out with other people." And I explained about Fella's stressful situation.

He responded by saying his ex is weirding out his life. Her sister is gone, leaving him as the only caregiver. He hired someone to look in on her while he was out of town for the holiday. He came home to find all the burners on the stove turned on.

Suicide attempt? No. She thought she was turning on the microwave.

By profession, she's a high-powered stock expert, earning over $600 million for a major financial corporation last year. She's been trying to read the Wall Street Journal and watch CNBC, but her comprehension is minimal.

Worse yet, she's forgotten they are divorced. She walks into the bathroom when he's in there. She climbs into bed with him at night.

"How do you handle that?" I asked.

"Well....I push her back out of the bathroom...cause I'm usually pooping," he said. I had to laugh. He keeps a cheerful heart, no matter what. "If I'm in the tub, I'll tell her I'll be out in a few. If I'm in the bed, I get her up and help her back to the other room."

She thinks he's mad at her for the surgery. She has no memory of cheating on him or of them breaking up.

He told me it puts a crimp in dating, too. "What happened in Ogden hasn't happened again," he said. "But I'm probably telling you too much."

I assured him that it's okay. I'm interested in anything he wants to say. He thanked me for that.

I had to wonder, did he mention Ogden as a way of telling me he doesn't have another dating relationship like that? Or to let me know he's not sleeping with his ex?

Honestly, I wanted to cry for him, and for her. It's like when someone has dementia and forgets a loved one is dead. You can't say, "But they're dead!" because for that person, the grief is new. For his ex, they've been in love and suddenly, he's turning her away. How sad for her. How hard for him, to break her heart when that love is long gone for him.


Queeny said...

What a sad story. I'm sad for them both. Seems like a lot to handle.

On another note, sometimes I wish I could forget I'm married (but that's a long story).

I hope things get better for your friend.

Blogget Jones said...

It does. Makes me want to cry for him. He's such a dear sweet man, really. It's not fair on either of them.

LOL about forgetting you're married! I can sympathize.

Sassy Lucy said...

You know that makes me think of The much love changes when faced with dementia/alzheimers or any such thing. I feel for them both. They have a heavy load to bear.
It is good he has you to talk to.
You know I am pure northerner and I know what country fried is and how dang delicious it is.
Come meet my new nephew...I posted his pic today.

Blogget Jones said...

You know what's weird, Lucy? I've not seen The Notebook and just bought the book last week. Maybe it's not a good time to read it?

It hurts me to know what heartache this situation makes for him, and for her. I'll be there for him all I can be.

See? I knew that the country fried thing had to extend past the south! It's too delicious!

And your nephew is adorable! You must be so proud of him!

:o) BJ

Sassy Blondie said...

First, if you read The Notebook, have a box of tissues handy. If you then proceed to watch the movie The Notebook, just go ahead and expect to need a few more boxes of tissue. I literally cried when I read the book, and then again I bawled when I saw the movie. I own both, by the way.

Second, it must be extremely difficult for both of them. I hope they both find peace.

Last, I'm sure he mentioned Ogden to let you know that he's not forgotten you or your encounter, he's not really dating, and the sleeping with the ex thing. Plus, the man is still calling you, Blogget!

Holy shit! I need just half your life...

Blogget Jones said...

Okay, I have fair warning about The Notebook! Putting tissues on my shopping list for the week....

I think you're right about why he mentioned Ogden. I mean, he could have said, "I haven't had sex," but he referenced *us* specifically. Oh, I wish we had a chance to cross paths before November!

Blogget Jones said...

Oh, and sometimes I think my life runneth over too much....I need some peace!