In two days....

....I'll be 41. August 22nd, 1968. All I can say is praise the Lord for birthday cake! I want to corner piece, with all the icing! I've earned it!

You hear me Son?? That piece is mine!

Another year, and what a year it's been. No recap. I don't know if I could actually take writing all that out, again.... Oh, by the way, the court date changed again. September 1st, now. THAT is driving me crazy.

So, I saw the orthopedic surgeon today. Or rather, his physician's assistant. He does the intake and initial evaluation. I'm in oodles of pain today, so it was probably a good day to see the reality of it.

Ranger went with me. He couldn't stand just waiting for me to call with the results. We go into the little exam room, where I have to change into shorts that have elastic instead of metal fasteners. Then, off to x-ray I go. Ranger stayed in the exam room while they led me to the x-ray and MRI area. This place runs like a well-oiled machine, I swear. I walk past the scheduling offices, the checkout offices, the other exam room "pods", and finally to the waiting area outside the x-ray room door.

And I sit. Uncomfortably. The door opens and a man says to a woman still inside, "Just sit here for a couple of minutes while I check the films."

Then, she makes her entrance. A big poof of ponytail tops a body draped in hospital gown and bathrobe, with men's tube socks stretching off her toes. She literally flounces into the chair. I mean, she is the definition of flounce.

"Hi!" she exclaims to me. "Are you getting pictures today, too?"

I nod. She throws herself across the empty chairs, tossing her head back. "Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up!"

Dang, she's funny! I'm laughing at her performance. The scheduling office is, too.

"May I ask, who is your doctor?"

"Cliff," I said.

"Oh, I hear good things about him!" We chat about how much easier it is to have all the facilities you need in one place, then the door opens, and the man leads her back to her exam room. She waves at me from down the hall.

Soon, he's back and it's my turn. More "ben this way," and "bend that way." And not the fun kind of bending, either. Ugh. The pictures look good, so I'm back to the exam room.

The man pauses to pull up my x-rays on the room's computer. Then leaves. Ranger and I stare at the screen.

You can see it. Plain as day. Lovely-spaced vertebrae, then you get to the end of my spine. Or near it. The white cloudiness of my bones blends together, with sharp points protruding from the sides. Bone on bone, with bone spurs.

Ouch.

I mean, it's one thing to hurt. It's another to know why you hurt. It's yet another to see it so clearly, right in front of you.

It was a little much for Ranger. I looked at him and tears were welling up in his eyes. "Oh my God, baby," he said. He came to me and held me. "You must hurt so much. I don't want you to hurt like that."

I almost cried, too. He loves me so very much. His world is wrapped around me. All he wants is to make me happy and satisfied. All the problems he has right now, and I still know I'm lucky to have a love like this. He loves unselfishly. And lets me love as I want to, also. It's what I've always wanted and needed. The rest just needs to work out, too.

The PA finally arrived and put me through more bending. More questions. One thing I never get tired of is the look on people's faces when I say I have three kidneys. Cracks me the hell up. I know....I'm a sick puppy sometimes.

So, we have three possibilities. The pain is either from the disc itself (which is hard to treat), the joints there rubbing together, or damage to the nerve sacks. The need an MRI to see those details. In any case, I need physical therapy to strengthen my core for any treatment they do.

I have the MRI tomorrow morning. I see the doctor and get the results on Monday. And I start physical therapy on Monday.

Should be a fun start to the week....but maybe, just maybe, I'll get some answers and a course of treatment. I just hope they're on the ball with this. I don't need conservative treatment. I've had this for 16 years. Let's do something about it, fellas!

But on Saturday, I get cake. Eye on the prize, dear Diary!