Karl.
Some people say that when one door closes, another opens. As I mentioned before, something cosmic is going on with Karl. It's still a mystery how we each dialed a local number and wound up talking to each other instead. It's become a joke between us. He'll call me and ask "Is this so-and-so's wife?" I'll respond, "Yes, Dr. Nelson." And he'll ask if we can play doctor some time.
Oh, he's adorable.
This banter started on the day of my lowest point with the Greg situation. Karl doesn't know that. He doesn't know about Greg or my heartache. He doesn't know the salve he's been for that, in just being himself. He's lovely - in speech, thought, appearance.
Even though he asks about "playing doctor," he makes it clear that he doesn't want to get into any sex-talk. He doesn't want me to misinterpret him. He doesn't want me to think that sex is his focus when getting to know me. He's looking for compatibility in thought, aspirations, priorities, and then in sex.
"Your intelligence is a huge turn on for me," he writes. "I like that you're an educated woman."
"I hope all of your dates go awful," he says. "Except ours."
The soonest he'll be here is July. Oh, for pity sake! This is a challenge for The Queen of Impatience, here. I'm not good at waiting. It makes me even more insane than I tend to be on a daily basis.
He's always been draw to the western United States. He lives in Florida because that's where his ex's family lived. The ex would never leave Florida. He was offered a great job in a town not far from here, but had to turn it down because she wouldn't consider moving. Once the kids were grown, though, the divorce was inevitable. Their children are 23 and 19, with a grandchild on the way. He's 49. Ten years older than me. It's a big birthday year for each of us.
For years, he's made it known that he did not intend to stay in Florida. His sister has lived here for 30 years, and he's never visited here. When he started planning vacation, though, he says he felt drawn to Grand Junction. He felt driven to visit his sister. He loves the drier climate. He loves the mountains. He's researched this area and has bought a new camera, to get back into photography and capture what he sees here. He couldn't wait to get here.
Now, he really can't. Now, he's talking about looking for jobs here, shopping for housing. The draw of Grand Junction has gotten stronger, as he's felt more drawn to me.
One morning, he sent me a video. It's a foreign commercial for Knorr soup mix. The couple in it meet when she accidentally dials a number in a video conferencing room. She sees this man in Russia. They end up meeting for dinner via video conference, and romance is born. It's lovely and sweet, and started my day off with a smile and a warm heart. I told him so. He says he keeps videos like that on his laptop, to give himself a boost when he's down. How lovely is that?
He has an appreciation for the aesthetically pleasing. His father and sister were/are artists. He reads history and literature, but other genres, too. He recommended "The Secret" to me, to help explain our wrong numbers. He reads erotica, but only that written by women. "The stuff written by women is by far the best," he says. "Women writers are more descriptive and more about the act of love than the culmination of the act."
He collects pin-up art and early issues of Playboy. "The girls were curvier then," he says. "And I like curves." And he cooks, too! "I love cooking but not all the time. I always envision cooking beside my woman. Making dinner together." I often have the same kind of daydreams, when cooking alone.
What I appreciate about him is the lack of guessing games. I don't have to wonder what he's thinking because he'll tell me. And he really wants to know what I think. The other night, he asked me, "Do you ever want to get married again?"
"Yes," I said. "But anyone who gets involved with me must understand how independent I am, and why. I've learned to be responsible for my own well-being. It's nothing against them, but experience has taught me that anything can happen."
To which he said, "Blogget, I would want you to be in total control of your life and be respected for your ideas, perspectives, and opinions."
I told him that although I'm independent, I want to share my life with someone on many levels. He said, "I want my life to intertwine with someone as you do. I want to share our dreams, goals and heartbreak as well. A passionate person. Some who can express themselves physically and well as verbally." Yeah, I can do that. Anyone who's read this blog knows that!
We talked a little about dating and how hard it is. He told me, "Protect your heart. But be open to the person God may bring into your life. I don't believe in coincidences. I hope we can meet. I want to meet you very much. I have done alot of "what ifs". What if we were so attracted to each other, we want to be with each other. I would move to there. Its a place I feel I have been called to. I would have to find a job or opportunity. I do have a very good job now, but that job will never keep me from my dreams or a woman that I feel I was meant to be with. Something I have to pray about. And what I pray about is this... timing and open doors. Serendipity . I hope you are a spiritual person." Yeah, I am...but maybe I should quit railing at God!
We have had some incredible communications via text messages. Although sex isn't a big focus, we do talk about what we like, and we have some playful chats. He can be very blunt, though.
"I love foreplay, especially throughout the day, then connecting when we come home. I would love to know what turns you on, and what your turn offs are."
One morning, as I was slowly waking in my hotel room, I got a message from him. "You have me so curious," he said. "What do you really yearn for? What are some of your desires? Where would you go if you travel?"
And: "Could you just relax and let me put your desires first? I would like to experience every inch of you, kissing and....."
"And what?" I said.
"I do hesitate in saying everything until we meet. I never want you to misinterpret me."
I told him to not worry. He's made his intentions and priorities clear. Don't hold back, I said. I'd rather know what you're thinking than not.
And thus, I opened the flood gates.
"You arouse me," he said. "I think of how your skin smells. Your hair and how you taste. I want to taste your soul, your spirit. I want to taste the very secret parts of you. I want to swallow your essence. Will you empty yourself into me and allow me to nourish your hunger?"
Oh my.
There's something very earnest, sweet, gentle, and passionate about Karl. I feel very drawn to him. The sound of his voice is soothing to me. He makes things all right, without even knowing there's anything to put right. He longs for the give-and-take that I've longed for, and always manage to miss having in the end. There's a synchronicity between us that's almost spooky. I think of him, he calls. I need someone, he calls. July can't get here soon enough.
I told him this. He said, "I feel the same for you. I have so many things I think about."
I texted him when we got to to the hotel in Dallas, to let him know we'd gotten there safe. I was exhausted, and he knew it. "Shall I tuck you in with a bedtime story?" he asked. And I melted.
6 comments:
Again, I shall say WOW!! does he have a nephew my age. lol
He is soooooooo Romantic.
I wish that you get what you want when you and he finally meet, I am hoping for a fairytale. Cinderella does live on!!!!! HUH?
That's what I'm hoping for, too. I have to make sure to sustain this level of interest between now and then. He's a little unbelievable, so I'm trying to relax and just believe. Our ideas and wants are so similar. He makes me laugh. Oh boy, oh boy....this could be something else!
:o) BJ
well, you got one punky loudmouthed semi-lush cheerleader over here, though i simply fucking refuse to wear a mini skirt!
Don't make keeping the level seem like worth, really emotion simply flows from within. Sounds like you have a good thing here...Run with it, and maybe let the painful ones slip past you? Just that mother in me ya' know.
Hey girl! I know I haven't commented in a long time, but I can't comment from work anymore. Anyway, I've been keeping up with you. I just want to say... those other guys were just not right for you. At least not the timing. let them go. Just relax (try) and see if things work out with Karl. Don't force it. Just relax. If it's meant to be, it will be. Good luck, friend. :)
Awww, Darth! No mini skirts?? Actually, that's fine with me.... Thanks for being a cheerleader for me ;o)
Mama Bear, you're right. This with Karl is just happening, it flows. It's not work. I just have to be patient until he gets here....then we'll really see how it is!
KP - I'm so glad you're back! So you've read all the sordid tales already? Well, something different is going on with this one. Something cosmic. I think of him, and my phone rings. I'm amazed.
Thanks, friends :o)
BJ
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